Well, summer may not be officially recognized by our calendars yet....but my classes are now over for this semester. Grades are in (all A's)...yes!!! I am soooo ready for a respite. This semester was soooo busy. The fall promises to be even more "fun"!!!! Yikes
I don't know how much blogging I'll do, but I just felt like blabbing a bit. I'm so addicted to Facebook now, that I rarely blog. I get all of my frustrations, joys, etc. out in that format now. It's also enabled me to reconnect with so many friends. Friends I haven't seen since high school.
It's been nearly a year now since I was summarily dismissed from a job I held for 30 years. I'm not as fixated on the whole ordeal as I was, but I am still angry...and confused. I still do not understand WHY it happened. Nor do I understand how a "man of the cloth" could do such a thing. I guess I will never know. He refuses to apologize. I must find a way to make peace for myself.
But without a job.....without a paycheck.....for nearly a year....it's not been easy. And as time goes on, it's only gonna get worse. And that burden is only gonna dredge up my feelings of anger for this person. I pray that God will give me peace to move on. I pray that He will help me find a way to get beyond the anger and hurt and just go on. I don't expect I will ever get any answers...and for me, that's a hard one! I always wanna know "why"? This is just one of those times I may not receive my answer.
I pray that God will help us find a way to survive ..... financially, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. The whole "incident" has left me and my family devoid of a spiritual connection. I so need that. I so want that. Not just for me, but for them as well. I don't know where this journey will take us. I don't know where it will end. I can only pray that God, in His infinite wisdom, will give me peace. I know He will allow things to happen the way they should. I just hope I have wisdom and fortitude enough to let go and let God!
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About Me
- Kim
- I am an adult who has returned to college to pursue my degree in elementary education. I have been married for 17 years and have a 13-year-old beautiful, brilliant daughter.
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Thanks for taking the time to come to my blog. I hope you enjoy reading my random thoughts. Maybe somewhere along the way, you'll connect with something I've said. Blessings to you.
1 comment:
Kim,
I went through the exact same thing. Dismissed after 17 years, no reason given (although in my case I knew that it was a variety of co-workers and an outside consultant working behind my back). In two weeks time I went from "you're part of the long term plans of this radio station" to "do you want to resign or be fired?". And I was mad. In the end I realized that I was 1: anchoring myself in the past by hanging on to the anger, and 2:letting that person remain in control of my life. So here's what I did (your mileage may vary)
Decided that I was going to let myself have one last really good bout of being PO-ed. I had the imaginary arguments in my head, told the SOB off in vivid and comprehensive terms.
Then I decided to forgive him.
THAT took a while. But it was something that I worked at every day. I remembered points 1 & 2, and simply decided to move on. Today I'm left with a sadness but no more anger. I will certainly never trust that person again and never place myself in a position where they have an influence on my life. But we can pass on the street and be pleasant.
But it was something I needed to do for me. And something I'll wager you need to do for you.
Hang in there.
Peace
Jay
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